| happy birthday |
[Aug. 12th, 2009|12:00 am] |
all the personal stuff I write is... personal. And the rest is mostly pointless exhibitionist egotism and image-obsession, because that's all I can think of when writing public stuff about myself. It's pretty lame, but it's a lot easier just for me to keep it to a private forum than to try to change in that way right now. No, really, I'm very confident.
Also, I like the physical book I have, cause it always goes on the bus with me and to class and outside and doesn't give me a headache like this stupid computer and all that action.
But I still want to read all the supercool journals of my supercool friends, so I'm keeping the username and journal, just not updating.
so for now I present black on black and an embarassing backlog of drivel and shit. |
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| (no subject) |
[Oct. 2nd, 2003|03:02 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | chipper | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Tom Waits | ] |
one public post for brian cause he's awesome and i miss him and he's visiting in the spring
College is crazy crazy crazy! It's insane that I've hardly been here for more than a month. Looking back to that first day, coming into my empty dorm room and realizing that I had a new home seems like years ago. And in a sense, it is a very long time ago. I think more has changed in the last four weeks than in the twelve months preceding.
At times I feel almost cheated because it's so easy and I have so much free time, but then I remember that I have a book to read that night and it all comes back into perspective. There's been a lot of reading, and a fair amount of writing, but not so much that I don't have a huge amount of free time. Sometimes it's hard, cause I have a lot of awesome friends in the dorm, and they're always up to a good time. There have been days that I woke up intending to do work, and ended up just bouncing from friend to friend all day getting nothing done. But for the most part a little time management makes it totally possible to stay on top of the workload and still have enough time for lots of play. Plus, all of the work I'm doing is cool. Some of the reading is dense and makes my brain bleed, but it's all good stuff, and I'm liking my classes more every day. They're all really inspiring and exciting.
The people here are really great, and it's strange how quickly I've become really close to some of them. Everybody's really interesting, even the people who're convinced they aren't compared to the rest have amazing stories to tell. It kinda strange and artificial to be thrown into the business with 1000 strangers from all over the country (and globe) with no previous experience together, and end up with them being your best friends for half the year. I'm so glad that I made it across the country, though. No offense to you west coast kids or anything, I love you all, and think of you all the time, but it's cool to totally start over. I was ready for that, and I didn't really have a home in the bay area anymore anyway. I'll be glad to come back on vacation, though. So yeah, the people here are amazing. I've been kickin it with some of the older folks that live in mods, and they remind me a lot of the old-school schools group corps. Really inspiring people doing really cool stuff. It's impossible not to be incredibly excited about being alive here. I hate to go to sleep every night because I can't stop thinking about the awesome stuff that I could be doing. It also makes it a lot easier to stay clean and sober hanging out with folks that make you excited about life, though I have been guilty of little bits of social drinking, but not often and not sloppy-drunk at all.
Don't get me wrong, it's been a really tough few weeks in a lot of ways, but it's really impossible to not end up loving it here. Even the super-cynical kids from enormous schools who learned to hate learning are digging it, though according to previous statistics, two out of three of them will choose/be allowed to come back again next year. Kinda scary, but not so much when you realize that it's all based on the choices that they're making, not some lottery.
I'm also back in action after a semi-serious knee-injury and playing Ultimate again. It's possible that we'll end up playing beach tournaments in Brazil and Italy this year, which would be fucking awesome! Yeah, and the ultimate team is awesome, especially when not too intoxicated. Yeah, last tournament was in Montreal, where drinking age is 18... But beach tournaments or not, it's so much fun just playing with that team.
We should do mixtapes/care packages.
Sam Harkness
Box 513 Hampshire College
PO Box 5001
Amherst, MA 01002-5001
ps, there's tons of fuckin awesome music here. molly's gonna get a mixtape cause she gave me her address... |
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| (no subject) |
[Sep. 14th, 2003|07:02 pm] |
i think i might have forgetten to give this out:
smh03@hamphshire.edu
413.559.4441 (personal line) |
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| (no subject) |
[Aug. 29th, 2003|12:44 am] |
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well, i guess that means we're going friends only |
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| le vitalis |
[Aug. 27th, 2003|07:01 pm] |
black eyes/q and not u/el guapo
thursday 9/11(!) 8pm @ davis ballroom, smith college $7 at the door |
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| (no subject) |
[Aug. 26th, 2003|12:23 am] |
| [ | music |
| | Friday I'm In Love, The Cure | ] |
the obvious thing to do is to write some grandiose goodbye post or something, but that's not what's going to happen. oh no, i'm gonna keep you on your toes. don't mess with this shit, let me tell you...
but i can't really thing of anything at all to write, so whatever, yo. other than that i've got a flight leaving in six and a half hours and that means more than i can possibly imagine until after the fact. like whoa.
ok, one thing i gotta get out: i had this great little copy of catcher in the rye and i'm afraid it got lost in the move out of my old house. i have a few big boxes of books in storage, but i don't see why i would have stored it, seeing as how it's one of my favorite books and i read it pretty often. it was small and dark read with a nice yellow title, and it one of the matte paberbacks that don't feel like some cheap glossy tom clancy shit, but just a nice little paperback. i really liked it, and i remember buying from wessex used books a little more than three years ago. this is so my style to distract myself with some trivial shit like this to take my mind off the giant looming stuff that's gonna totally kick my ass. well, it works. doesn't it?
so, i'll see you bay area folks in december, i'll be coming back on the 16th, and am leaving either on jan 2nd, or maybe the 29th or something, haven't yet decided about january term. hmm. well, anyways, sorry i didn't see molly, or get much quality time with brian. anyways, i won't forget you guys, but i'm not gonna waste time saying you'll always be my very best friends or anything. but i really do look forward to seeing you all on vacations, you guys are awesome and i'm not gonna forget that you made my senior year bearable if not awesome.
ben, dunno if you read this journal or not, but assuming you do, i've been thinking of you a lot for some reason recently. you're an awesome guy, and i really like you.
i hope stuff works out for all of you. see you folks in december. for now, it'll have to be an X-country party!
love
sam
i have one last piece of important wisdom to impart:
download something by 'agent steel' i accidentally got a song called 'the ripper' and holy shit is it awesome. it's hottttterxthanxhotttxsexxxxx!!!! omg i luv you guys! |
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| i think i used to be cool |
[Aug. 22nd, 2003|10:44 am] |
| [ | mood |
| | insipid (actually i just like | ] |
| [ | music |
| | thursday | ] |
i'm gonna be gone by tuesday morning. that's fucking crazy, and it means i have a lot of work to do, which is nice cause i want out of this house, this area, this family, this head. i'll be glad to come back on vacation though, but that's what it'll be: a temporary vacation, a visit, a chance to remember the things i want to, and never see those that i don't. beautiful |
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| ricky ran home |
[Aug. 16th, 2003|08:32 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | rumsfeld rhapsody | ] |
| [ | music |
| | some red handed sleight of hand | ] |
awesome moment of the day: long air guitar session in the shower to incredibly loud cursive. too bad the landlord lives right under my subwoofer. sometimes my life is pretty fucking great.
anyway, it seems that my new home is room C408, Merrill House (single, coed, semi-quite, non-smoking) Hampshire College, Amherst, Mass. phone number 413-559-4441, i think. maybe that's not how it works
kinda a lot to think about. i won't believe it till i'm there, but this does make it a lot more real. wow.
well, deep green rocked (except the chris freaking out part of it, which was pretty constant, but never taken too seriously) and i'm home today and sunday, and then leaving for the sierras 4 or 5 am on monday, and returning by friday morning to pack up and ship off my worldly possessions, and then be off to hampshire on tuesday. whoa. i think peter is gonna throw us a little party, which is the coolest thing in the world, and i'm real happy about the fact that people like peter exist, party or not. yup. more later, sleep now |
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| elaboration on last post |
[Aug. 14th, 2003|01:02 am] |
worried- yes
pissed- subconsciously
betrayed- according to me
recognized- hardly
ok, this is sam's ego-time. i am all pissed cause i'm putting so much into this conference, and it's really not working out so well cause that's how life is. not only do i get to handle my own shit, but also get to do half the stuff other people say they will do, as well as everything that's left over. for some, there are genuinely good reasons, and gratitude expressed for me shouldering the extra weight, and it feels good to help where help is needed. but in the end, to get treated like some servant who fucked up by another "organizer" who hasn't done except come to meetings late and tell me 'this conference fucking sucks'. oh man, it's awesome. yes it is. i'm not doing it for the recognition, i'm really not, but to be treated like shit for working hard just isn't cool by any standards. i mean, i haven't put that much into it, but just to brutally criticized by the people (aka chris) who are holding me back is fucking obnoxious and hurtful. i've probably put 50 or so hours into this, as well as just a lot of intellectual and emotional energy into this over the last six weeks, and countless more in the preceeding months, and some money and whatnot. yeah, i'm just pissed, partly cause i've not met my expectations, partly cause i've been treated like shit by somebody who has no right to judge, and partly cause i'm pissed the world doesn't revolve around me.
thank god for having a sense of humor about it (i'll fucking kill you).
love you all |
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| (no subject) |
[Aug. 14th, 2003|12:42 am] |
| [ | mood |
| | freakout | ] |
| [ | music |
| | beta band | ] |
livejournal is lame. that's my newly mature assessment. |
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